Intro

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In case you missed the news, we won an OFFIE for Sound Cistem! It’s very cool but also very weird because the Vault Festival was one of the last times we were able to perform it for an in person audience. Hopefully, someday in the not too distant future, it will be safe to do it again. We miss this show so much, and all the amazing post-show convos we get to have. 

 

Anyway, it’s time for Ayden’s first blog post omg! Life has been kicking my ass as of late so this is what you get. Enjoy x

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Down to Clown

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What's the first thing you think of when someone mentions clowns?

 

Tim Curry? Children’s entertainers of yesteryear? Little dolls in funny outfits? 

 

I used to really hate clowns. Spooky, weird, unfunny and generally carrying some v cursed energy. Not my cup of tea. Or at least, that's what I had been taught to feel.

 

But then I actually met some clowns, I got to know them, and you know what I realised? Clowns are massively misunderstood creatures. We judge a whole diverse community by the actions of a few killer clowns, but the clowns I know aren’t spooky or creepy at all, or at least not in any way that matters. The clowns I know (and I’m including all you mimes out there) are beautiful, creative, complex beings with the same dreams and needs as any of us.

 

 Clowns are reviled by society, they are mocked, laughed at, run away from. Well I think it's time we run to clowns and let them into our lives. We’ll all be better off for it. Let us allow them to enlighten us with their unique understanding of what it means to be the object of ridicule. Clowns understand better than anybody the deep writhing feeling of humiliation, the high of thinking you have found someone who understands you and the freefall when it turns out they only like you for your big shoes or your squirting flower. 

 

Especially those of us who are queer and/or trans. We really ought to know better than to judge clowns by how they are represented in film and television, after all, the way clowns are treated in popular media seems shockingly similar to the way queer people have historically been represented, and I’m sure that’s not a coincidence. We need to recognise that clowns in fact have massive sexual power that is not recognised by any mainstream clown representation.

 

Clowns are just like us, they have dreams, they have ambitions, they love, they hate. And most importantly, clowns fuck. 

 

If the fact that clowns fuck is shocking to you, I’m going to need you to stop and analyse that feeling, because that’s incredibly narrow minded and coulrophobic of you. Some clowns are kinky, some clowns are vanilla, some clowns want to watch you have sex with a centaur, some clowns are in long term committed relationships with mimes or other clowns. Clowns have extensive polycules. Clowns fuck tender, clowns fuck rough, clowns fuck with strap ons or sometimes clowns just read you some of their poetry because they don’t really feel comfortable having sex on the first date. Think of the ways you fuck, clowns fuck that way too. Clowns honk when they come, or they come silently, their face stretching into an extortionate expression of exquisite pleasure. Clowns will bring you a post-fuck snack of some pie and then rub it in your face. Then they will apologise for making a mess of the sheets. 

 

I stand in solidarity with my sexy clown siblings, and I welcome them into my heart and into my home. If there are any clowns in your local area, let them know that you see them and that you care. Ask them if they need any help or support. The only way we will find true liberation is by supporting each other, and if your mutual aid or organising group doesn’t include clowns then what good is it doing? Ask yourself, what are you doing to support clowns? If you’re not sure where to start I would recommend attending one of Cerian (Wilshere Davies) The Clown’s Clown Cabarets. That’s how I met the clowns I now call friends and is an easy way to materially support UK based clowns. In these uncertain times, clowns need your support more than ever. 

 

Thank you.

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You can find Cerian The Clown, and lots of other wonderful clowns and mimes, at @queerclowncabaret on Instagram!